For several decades, I allowed perfectionism to sink its claws into the core of my being. It’s sneaky. Planning and preparing and putting your best foot forward is great practice. But when those good intentions turn into analysis paralysis and self-doubt and comparison, your joy is slowly and stealthily robbed. It is replaced by a mind that is on a continuously spinning hamster wheel. People-pleasing becomes an addiction that feeds on accolades. Soon you lose yourself to chasing the dopamine hit of others’ approval.
As 2024 was coming to a close, and I had several months and thousands of dollars of therapy under my belt, I had begun to recognize the incredibly liberating feeling of breaking free from the bondage of perfectionism and people-pleasing that had plagued me for far too long. During my therapy session this past week, I told my therapist that I recognized how far I’ve come when I attempted to update my photography website and royally screwed it up. Had that happened over a year ago, I would have spiraled and frantically tried to figure out how to fix it before people visited the site and judged me. Instead, I simply slapped up a disclaimer that the website was under construction and to please excuse my mess as I figured out how to undo my big blunder. Three days and countless frustrating moments later, my website had a facelift, and I was able to remove that disclaimer. It’s not perfect or quite how cool I had envisioned it to be, but it’s a thousand times better than what I had before. I’m proud that I didn’t allow my technological deficiencies to hold me back from giving it a go. Progress.
One of my biggest triggers that I had to recognize and reevaluate coming into 2025 was the amount of time I spent on social media. Staying “relevant” on social media for my business had consumed me for several years. I had little to nothing to show for the hours wasted, and I was on the brink of burnout. I could no longer tolerate the energy-sucking apps that demanded constant shifts and tricks to keep up with the ever-evolving algorithm. It was time for a change. I decided that 2025 was the year to do it scared. This meant being willing to suck at something new. That’s scary for a recovering perfectionist. My focus shifted from online likes to GENUINE connection with others (in person as much as possible). Ironically, as I stepped away from obsessively checking and posting on social media, doors began to open in the most pleasantly unexpected ways.
In early January, I found myself on a phone call agreeing to an opportunity that presented itself before I had a chance to overthink it. After the call, I seriously questioned WHAT I was thinking. Nerves started to kick in as I was researching and filling my cart with the equipment needed to complete this photography project. It would require a leap of faith and investing in and learning new equipment, but I decided to embrace my mantra and go for it. Mid February, several inches of lake effect snow fell as I drove to the location for a day packed with photo sessions. Cancelling was not an option, and the less than ideal road conditions added to my already fried nerves. But you know what? I freaking did it. A few weeks later, another dance studio reached out to me and asked for a similar service. Had I turned those opportunities down for fear of failure, I would not have hit my best first quarter EVER. They helped me get through the slump and imposter syndrome that inevitably hits every winter. More importantly, I proved to myself that I can, indeed, do it scared.
While photography remains a constant for me in 2025, a major pivot has taken place in other areas of my life. After over 20 years of working full-time, then part-time, then p.r.n. as a registered nurse for an orthopedic and spine surgeon, I stepped away from the medical field to focus on hospitality. My husband and I launched a vacation rental in the Poconos. We spent over two years building and dreaming up the space, and finally, our dream became a reality. Life takes us on expected twists and turns. I never foresaw owning and managing a vacation rental. Nursing had been my plan since grade school. I am so grateful for the years I had working with an amazing team of people who gave me room to learn and grow as a nurse. I think that second grade girl, who decided she wanted to grow up and be a nurse, would be proud of who she has become. But a second grade dream doesn’t necessarily mean a lifetime dream, and it was time for the page to turn.
Our first few months of launching our vacation rental have exceeded our expectations. I’d be lying if I said that I don’t get a tad anxious as guests arrive. We poured so much of our hearts and time and energy into providing a peaceful oasis. I’m always a bit on edge until I hear guest’s feedback of how much they are enjoying the dreamy getaway with their family, friends, and loved ones. I guess I’m still chasing accolades a bit. Do we ever tire of hearing words of affirmation and encouragement? This home to gather and make memories in reaches far beyond our little family. Every weekend and several weekdays since we launched in early January, our modern mountain chalet has been filled with friends, families, and loved ones seeking togetherness, nearby outdoor adventures, and a cozy respite from the daily hustle and bustle. Hospitality has always nourished my soul. This experience has already taught me so much about how to go above and beyond in caring for others while maintaining a balance of running a profitable business. It has helped me learn how to communicate with and serve my photography clients better as well.
As the spring and summer season is ramping up, I am so excited to be serving so many clients and guests. I am grateful for the grace that they extend to me as I learn and grow in these roles. While I am learning to let go of the perfectionism and people-pleasing, I also recognize that we never fully arrive. There is always room for us to improve from the lessons we learn along the way. As long as we don’t allow our mistakes to consume us, and as long as we take the time to recognize how far we’ve come, that’s progress. Progress–not perfection–is a healthy goal.
How about you? What have you pursued despite feeling intimidated? How have you overcome challenges and chased dreams? I would love to hear your story, so others can be encouraged to go for it as well. Perfection is not a reasonable or attainable goal. Instead, focus every day on progress. Celebrate the tiny steps as well as the big, terrifying ones. Cheers to doing it scared and thriving!
XO, Katie